A participating party refuses to make concessions about their case, although the path to a smoother, less stressful tomorrow is obviously in contradiction to what they say they want. How can they not see this?
It’s week 3 of your spouse lamenting about their latest struggles at work, and no matter what you suggest, you’re met with resistance. Why aren’t they at least trying to solve the problem?
“The other side” wants to handle the problem this way, but that’s clearly ridiculous and makes no sense. How could they think this way?
Everyday— in the mediation room, at home, in the world— we are confronted with choices, beliefs and actions of others that we may not understand or agree with. And when others think differently than we do, it’s easy to conclude that “they” are blind, ignorant, careless, foolish. This labeling creates a distance between “us” and “them,” one that feels good, initially, because it assures us that it is not us who are “stupid” or foolish, it is “them.” We are the smart ones, the right ones, the ones who see clearly. If only “they” could think like us.
In maintaining this distance, we also maintain the subconscious belief that if those who disagreed with us would only come over to our side, things would be better, the problem would be solved, and all would be right. The greater the distance between “us” and “them,” the easier it is to maintain this belief.
We at Prism Group, though, believe resolution happens when both parties are willing to bridge that gap, to close the distance between “our side” and “the other side.” We believe resolution happens— at work, at home & in the world—when each side has the courage to walk towards the other in efforts to understand them.
Walking towards “the other” requires us to put our Egos aside, however. When we choose resolution, we must also choose to abandon our position and seek to understand another. We must choose to forego being “right” in exchange for moving forward in resolution together. Prism’s path to resolution is not about what each side wants, it’s about what both sides want: resolution. We believe resolution begins with an effort to understand “the other side”— at work, at home & in the world.